Life Above Reproach Essay

By Dennis Reagan

I grew up in an Irish-Catholic family.  It was just my sister and myself in our immediate family, but lots of aunts, uncles, and cousins since my father was the youngest of ten—five boys and five girls.  I was baptized as a baby to be absolved of original sin, I was told.  I made my first communion at 7 years old and my confirmation at 12, when you become soldiers of Christ in the Catholic Church.

My parents divorced when I was 4 and my sister was 13 months old, and then we lived with our father.  He made sure we went to mass every Sunday, although he seldom did.  We went until he died when I was 15.  I continued going to church for a time, but less and less often and then, mainly at Christmas and Easter.

I realize now that I never took the devil very seriously.  I saw him as more of just a concept for evil.  I also didn’t take God seriously enough.  I always thought of myself as basically a good person, not perfect, but good.  I really didn’t know that the whole time, I was under the devil’s influence doing his bidding.

At the time I thought the things I was doing were just the natural, normal things that men do.  The things I considered natural and normal were fornications, the adulteries, the drug abuse, alcohol abuse, divorces, affairs, pornography, and failures.  I failed two marriages.  I failed my children, though I thought I was doing my best.  I know now just how badly I failed as an example.

I came to prison in 2004 still thinking of myself as a basically good man.  I still believed in God until around 2009 or so when my son was killed.  My son’s death did not stop me from believing in God, it was my own “intellect” and “reason.”   With no pun intended, the devil made me do it.  Of that, I am now certain.

In May of 2016, I read a “Prayer for Salvation and Baptism in the Holy Spirit” to a friend.  A few days later, I read the same prayer to my girl, Penny, but this time I really believed it.  I was born again either May 4^th or 10^th of 2016.

Although I had read the Bible years before, it is fairer to say that I just read it than to study the Word of God.  That and many other things have changed since I truly accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior.  Besides “Life Above Reproach,” I also have been taking a Bible study course by mail from ECS.  I am hungry to study and learn the Word as I never was before.  I know now that I am saved and I will spend eternity with my Lord.  I also want to be able to serve the Lord now, here on earth.  I want all of His promises as well, but faith cannot operate beyond your knowledge of God’s Word.  I have to study and learn, really learn the Word of God.  I also have daily devotionals, teachings on CDs, books on faith, and I watch TBN, a Christian TV station, as much as I can.  I have started attending church regularly; Christian, not Catholic.

I know now that I am saved by grace through faith, not by works.  I have also come to realize that we are in a spiritual war of good vs. evil, and it is far more than just a concept.  It is God, the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit against Satan and his minions.  I know what side I’m on now; the side of God the Father, His Son Jesus Christ, and the Holy Spirit.  The devil had me in his clutches for far too long and without me even being consciously aware of the fact, but no more!  I am a servant of my Lord Jesus who paid a price, a dear price, for my freedom.  I am forgiven, I am redeemed, and I give thanks for it in the name of Jesus.