LIFE ABOVE REPROACH

Wicked Intent Shielded by God’s Grace

My testimony opens up doors that are scared with regret, shadows lurking on every corner, and deception that’s tainted with blood.  The life of Aaron S. King is not your typical gangster tale.  Murder, Mischief and Mayhem was the substance fed to me in a baby bottle.  From the cradle to the grave, I thought the streets could save me.  I didn’t realize I was enslaved to sin, even plagued by the stench of death.

“Where can I go from Your Spirit?  Or where can I flee from Your Presence?  If I ascend into heaven, You are there.  If I make my bed in hell, behold, You are there.”  (Psalms 139:7-8)

The tears of this concrete jungle are real.  Penitentiary steel couldn’t penetrate the rusted callus over my heart.  No form of reasoning could give me the fix like Jesus could.  The logic of the street and sticking to the g-code was killing me softly.  I didn’t realize the screams for help I heard were my own.  Every step I took was calculated with poison, and no viper could resist my venom.  This was my reality of being a so-called thug on his quest for notoriety.  Every street punk wants his street credibility intact.  But what extremes would he go to achieve this status?  The devil had me fooled like the street really loved me, like thehomies really appreciated my gangster.  Gangbanging was part of my ghetto culture.  The homies were my tribe of warriors ready to go to war.  My mother never raised me to be a killer.  However, if my buttons were pushed to the limit, “which happened on many occasions…” Getting money was a profession I idolized, and when you mix that with banging, “trust me” it’s a deadly mix.  At the drop of a hat, my homies would ride for me.  Killers did what they did, while hustlers did what they did.  This was a typical day on the set.  Looking at the collective, this allowed us to be gangsters as we pressed hard to make a name in the streets.

Set tripping (gang violence) was a fundamental thing for me, and carrying a pistol was a habit that made people scatter quickly.  Even though I was a pistol holder, it was my protection to keep me from getting killed.  Being good with my hands had people trying to take my life, (thank God for His grace).  I have a natural gangster limp now because of the bullet wounds.  I really didn’t think twice about the enemies I was making, nor did I think twice about those trying to kill me.  Everyday that I walked out my door I was taking a chance of sleeping in a burial plot.  This is a glimpse of my past in order for someone to have a future.  The streets can never get the glory for what God has saved me from.  These are the echoes of homies’ voices that want change, but they were gunned down in their struggle trying to be gangster in a dead world.

From gang violence, suicidal tendencies, and reckless behavior, my life story just can’t be put on a few pages: “It won’t give me no gangster justice!”  The struggles I’ve been through can’t be taken for granted.  Abuse came in many forms, making me a victim and a prisoner of my own demise.  Due to neglect and uncertainty, I spent many years isolated on an island of self-pity tormented by circumstances beyond my control.  Gun towers have been my burden over half of my life, living behind concrete walls that never seem to bend.

In my early years, I was very critical of God.  “Why did God allow me to suffer so much pain?  Why was death on every corner in my hood?  And why would God spare a life like mine?”  I can imagine many people having the same questions.  I can throw many more in the air, but we all have our own cross to carry.  Ever since I was a child, the devil has had a death sentence on my life.  There was a time I gave him too much credit.  Now I know he is a coward that is trying to be worshiped.

When my brother was brutally gunned down left to drown in his own blood, my whole world was turned upside down.  My life would never be the same again.  The street really had me plagued with gang affliction under the illusion of darkness, while harboring a monster contemplating murder.  My brother’s death had me traumatized, plus my family was victimized and robbed of something precious.  Being a gangster was a serious task, yet the man behind the mask was dying fast.  I believed the capacity to kill was no problem.  However, with crime, there comes consequences and weighing out my options drove me mad.  God was definitely trying to get my attention.  “I guess I was too polluted with the sherm sticks (cig dipped in PCP) back them!”  The truth is I didn’t know who killed my brother.  But all I knew was I wanted blood to be on my hands.  Looking back I know the streets killed my brother and his murderer might still be walking the streets.  When you’re from the street you have an obligation to avenge the death of your homies.  Trust me, God knew my wicked intent.

My testimony is not to glorify my dirty laundry. Because if God didn’t use prison to save my life, there’s no telling how many lives would have fallen victim to my madness.  God allowed me to lose myself in order to find myself.

For the last 12 years, I have been sitting in prison realizing the purpose God has for my life.  Over the last couple of years, I havejust come to grips with my brother’s death.  I had to look in the mirror to find forgiveness in my heart.  I had to forgive my brother’s murderer and forgive myself for giving up on my life.  The Bible says that vengeance belongs to the Lord.  God has been fighting these unresolved issues for the past 18 years.  Ever since I’ve accepted Jesus as my Lord and savior, I realize being gangster is a Jesus thing.  “But the cowardly, unbelieving, abominable murderers, sexually immoral sorcerers, idolaters, and all liars shall have their part in the lake which burns with fire and brimstone, which is the second death.” (Revelation 21:8)

All my life I’ve been in a war zone on the frontline.  From being shot, stabbed, and the hand that promoted gang activity, I have found myself in some real compromising situations.  I’m ashamed of all the enemies I’ve made, but they seem to increase when you’re walking in Jesus’ name.

People probably don’t believe in miracles today,but the call of God was strong on my life after my brother’s death.  I heard the call plain and simple, consequently I ignored it for my own motives.  Every time I had the “desire to kill” cars would disappear, blocks would suddenly be empty, or as luck would have it, I would get a flat tire on my way to my first drive-by.  This had to be divine intervention!

The scars of the street have left me battered, shattered, and fractured in many areas of my life.  I never thought as a child that I would devote 27 years of my life to this system.  I could be the poster boy for the world’s dumbest criminal.  However, my life isn’t a laughing matter.  Doing time affects yourfamily, community, and yourself.  The prison atmosphere has changed over the years.  Younger men are coming in with no morals or respect.  This is a product of our generation.  They need to see the love of God.  Yet they think God’s grace is confined to the pages of Biblical history.  Jesus is more alive today more than ever.  I never thought Jesus could use somebody like me.  But if He can use a donkey, He can use me.

Currently I’m enrolled in the Urban Ministry Institute, a ministry of World Impact Inc.  TUMI is a 4-year college accredited seminary program that’s making me a better minister of God’s word.  Also, I’m working on my A.A. in sociology.  I’m trying to finish up a book or two and I just completed 8 months of Life Above Reproach.

Life Above Reproach has helped me to be transparent as a Christian, making me more accountable as a man of God.  Life Above Reproach makes men of God take a hard look at themselves.  This program tackles strong issuesand yet is fundamentally sound in dealing specifically with doctrinal truths.  I believe this program is a crash course on discipleship.  The structure of this program keeps men honest.

If there is any word I could leave the reader, I pray this can help them when times get hard or when they doubt God is “giving you the mantel of truth.”  God is concerned about you.  He doesn’t care about your rap sheet.  God is concerned about your heart condition.  We serve a God that likes to rescue people; a God that will never turn His back on you; a God that will preserve your life, protecting you from all harm; a God that shed His own blood for you; a God that is intimate and loving; a God that knows you by name; a God that says it’s okay; a God of eternal solution; a God that never changes; a God that always listens; a God that knows we make mistakes; a God that is speaking to you right now; a God that loves to hear you pray; a God that wants you to trust in His son; a God that doesn’t want you to worry; a God that wants to dry your tears; a God that just keeps on giving; a God that’s full of forgiveness; and also He’s a God of restoration and promise.

I guess we traveled many roads on this testimony.  The Holy Spirit is concise in all His actions. I believe this is what God wanted me to speak about.  When you have unforgiveness in your heart, you are walking around in misery.  But when you grasp the power of forgiveness, you can recognize supernatural healing that instantly takes place in your life.  When my brother died, a part of me was buried with him.  However, when Jesus came into my life, I was able to shake off those “grave clothes” and live again.  My desire is to speak life into people’s lives. There is enough poison out there already.  God didn’t save my life for me to take the life of someone else.  I’m a firm believer that God fights all my battles.  God doesn’t want us giving up on ourselves.  When the enemy is trying to take you out or someone has ill feelings toward you, just remember what David said to Saul when Saul was constantly trying to kill him.“Let the Lord judge between you and me, and let the Lord avenge me on you.  But my hand shall not be against you. As the proverb of the ancient says, ‘Wickedness proceeds from the wicked.’  But my hand shall not be against you.  After whom has the king of Israel come out?  Whom do you pursue?  A dead dog?  A flea?  Therefore, let the Lord be judge, and judge between you and me, and see and plead my case, and deliver me out of your hand” (1 Samuel 24:12-15).

God will repay evil for evil.  From a gangster prospective, “A gangster starts for what he believes in.”  Jesus wasn’t a coward.  He knew the warfare He was engaged in was spiritual.  Anytime a dying man says, “Father, forgive them for they know not what they do,” who am I to take the grace of God for granted?  God took my wicked intent and shielded it by His grace.  “We can all tilt a brim to that!”  Don’t make the mistake of letting a prison yard be your world canvas.  Jesus wants to come into your life.  Let God put you on a new path of life and you just sit back and enjoy the ride.

Aaron S. King

6/21/15